Charlie Don't Surf
 
 

by K.A. Rose

Final Fantasy VII and associated characters, et cetera, © and ™ Squaresoft/Square Enix, 1997-2005. Gensomaden Saiyuki and associated characters, et cetera, © and ™ Kazuya Minekura, ENIX and TV Tokyo, 1997. Used without permission, for nonprofit fan appreciation.

Rated R:VLST, meaning this story is rated Restricted (ages 17 and up) for merits of violence, foul language, sexual content, and the matter of topic discussed.

Enjoy.

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Flash Prologue
 
 

    The last time Sanzo had come back from a mission, it was worse. He'd wake up and there'd be nothing.
    The days passed like a slow poison. Rotting in his veins, dimming out his eyes. Thinking. Every second he sat in this temple, he was growing weaker. Every second his enemies were out in the bush, they got stronger.
    More enemies lately.
    The men from the east came in choppers and guns, line of thunder and fire through the trees, scorched up the jungle like gnarled matchsticks. Wutai City was scarred and battered. The men on the airwaves prattled with this ugly tongues to keep the fire away from the temples, to be peaceful, to be human. But those were kids up there. Angry, terrified kids. He knew what it was like to have your heart beating like a tiny tin drum. Wanting to shoot everything in sight.
    If he stayed here, he'd die. The death didn't worry him, it was the standing still. Every second a little more of him wearing away.
    Goku found him with his hand bloody, shards of mirror in his knuckles and couldn't say a goddamn thing.
    In Wutai everyone gets what he wants. Sooner or later.
    Sanzo wanted a mission.
    And for his sins, the gods gave him one.
    Down south along the Utai River, there was a brilliant scientist they said had taken his men into the jungle, and lost himself among the ruins of Houtoujou. The Three Aspects said that his methods, such as they once were, had become unsound. And that he had gone... totally insane.
    The Sanbutsushin looked down at Sanzo from their rivered veil.
    Yes, lords. Totally insane. Most obviously insane.
    The Sanbutsushin told him to take a crew. Past associates Son Goku, Cho Hakkai, Sha Gojyo. Travel down the Utai River to the ruins of Houtou Castle. Find Doctor Nii Jianyi. And terminate the doctor's authority.
    Terminate, lords?
    Buddhists do not kill.
    This mission does not exist, will never exist.
    It is from the Goddess Kanzeon Bosatsu hirself.
    Terminate with extreme prejudice.
    My lords, Sanzo said. What are the charges?
    Murder, they said.
    Murder. They expected to charge someone with murder in a place like this?
    They said he had the choice to decline, but really, he didn't.
    "Goku," he said to his charge, outside the temple gates. "I want you to run a message."
    Goku looked down from the arms of the peach tree. "Yeah?"
    "Go run to Gojyo's place. Tell him and Hakkai we're off to play hopscotch with hand grenades."
    "Hopscotch. Is it fun?"
    He'd trained the kid to shoot last summer but still couldn't buy it. Looking at him you couldn't believe he'd ever fired a gun in his life. Which would be right.
    Shit teacher that Sanzo knew he was.
    Goddamn, Goku. He was too young for this.
    And there was nothing to be done about it.
    Sanzo said, "We'll find out when we get there."
 
 

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